grace & faith

i just received bad news today. and i feel so guilty for that because i am the cause of this problem. but at the same time, i am so grateful for this lesson cause i can actually see why Allah ask His servants to obey His command. 

i can't describe all here. but my heart is full of luahan that can't be pour out. i think i will just stop here for now.

amirah, if you read this in the future, i hope that you are doing your best. being the best version of yourself. i am sure everything that happened is a 'sign'  from Allah to teach you something. so, be grateful for everything that you have in your life. and taatlah perintah Allah. akhirnya, apa yang Allah perintahkan itu tidak sia-sia. 

much love,

yourself.

-20.2.2020-

hi and assalamualaikum everyone. 👋

i am sorry for being hiatus from blogging because i am facing my SPM this year! 😩 so i kinda don't have time to write anything on my blog. so sebab tulah blog ni pun cam tergantung sepi je hm :) but alhamdulillah, i am a bit free now, so i think i want to write my thought regarding SPM, so that i can make an early preparation i guess? :) i write this for myself but i share it here so that you guys yang SPM jugak bolehlah baca kan hehe ☝☺

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as we all know, SPM this year diawalkan. awal bulan oktober dah mula dah. and its 8 months from now. belum tolak cuti yang berlambak tu lagi. if tolak-tolak, tinggal dalam 7 bulan je. so we need to do an early preparation ye anak-anak ☝☺. ya, ya i know that i didn't do much preparation as well, sebab tulah nak nasihat diri sendiri ni :) 

if you ask me, how i feel for SPM, all i can say is, i takut. yes, takut. tapi tak reti nak buat preparation ☝☺. i am sure that everyone already set their goal to get the best result in SPM right? nak straight A kan. same goes to me. I've planned everything that i need to do in order to get what i want. but as a human being, we all make mistakes. sometimes we fall into the same mistakes that we did before. repeatedly. and we tend to hate ourselves for being such. kan? :))

there's some day i will feel really motivated to do my homework and study. but the good day also came with bad day. sometimes my mood will takde langsung nak hadap homework yang berlambak. then, bertangguh-tangguhlah jadinya :) naik meluat tengok homework yang bertangguh tu ☝☺ 

but then again, i realized that it all started to be bad when i am too focus with my phone. as for me, sometimes your phone can be really toxic and ruin your mood for the whole day. it can easily interrupt you from doing your homework tahu tak. even when you say to yourself, "just a minute, i will continue the homework later." then, BOOM. habis semua homework kau tak siap.

benci kan benda tu? 

don't worry, you're not alone :)

and when you are in mood to settle your homework, and dah siap, you will feel soooo happy like semua halangan depan kau dah takde. bersih suci dan murni. then when you come to school the next day, and your friend asked you about the homework you've done, and kebetulan pulak kawan kau tu tak siap, kau akan rasa bersalah gila nak cakap kau dah siap sebab kau tak pernah-pernah siap homework ☝☺ sumpah rasa cam bersalah sebab takut ter-riak :) but if tak siap, nanti benci diri sendiri. 

so, it's so complicated ye anak-anak ☝☺ i donno la what to say.

but one thing for sure, it is all about ourselves. if you want to finish your homework, then finish it. don't be like others that procrastinate it just because the due date is lambat lagi. by hook or by crook, we, as a student need to finish our homework although we busy or not.

i remember my Chemist teacher once said, "berani ye kamu tak siap homework." to all my classmates. 

that word "berani ye" tu, really hit me hard tahu tak. sumpah sentap gila :") from that precious time, i will remember that significant word whenever i feel not to finish my homework hewhew.

but, you know what, all things will be okay and just follow the flow when we have a strong determination towards our goals. we need to set a realistic and specific goal. the goal that we love and betul-betul ikhlas nak capai. we cannot just say "i want straight A's" and dah tu je. without any "rasa" dalam hati. "rasa" yang you betul-betul nak that straight A's.